What You Need To Know To Navigate Tantrums Beyond Toddlerhood

What You Need To Know To Navigate Tantrums Beyond Toddlerhood

Alternatives to Punishment, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs
People expect tantrums to disappear after the toddler years, but that's just not how it works. Have you ever seen an adult screaming about something meaningless?!?!? Big kid tantrum! Tantrums for older kids are often wrapped up in unspoken fear, frustration, sadness, or anxiety explains Katie Hurley, child and adolescent psychotherapist and author of "The Happy Kid Handbook." Has your four, five, six or even ten year old ever melted down into a pile of tears or flung into a fit of rage? Do you occasionally have to deal with anger, fits of screaming, kicking or door slamming? Ever wonder if Tantrums Past the Age of Three Normal? Many parents worry about tantrums and big emotional outbursts past toddler-hood. You may have asked yourself if tantrums after the age of three are even normal. Or you may…
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Positive Parenting: Better Behavior Without Punishment Is Possible

Positive Parenting: Better Behavior Without Punishment Is Possible

Alternatives to Punishment, Family Communication, Parenting, Positive Discipline
A few years ago, my 3 year old daughter ripped her brothers' picture. She did it on purpose and with the intent to get back at her brother. Many parents believe that such "acting out"  needs to be managed with swift discipline. A punishment like time out or some kind of consequence to teach a lesson. In the moments when I feel my buttons getting pushed, sometimes I fall into thinking about that too.  I've seen over the years with my children and working with so many families that such measures simply don't help children behave better. But there positive strategies that do. Instead of putting my daughter into time out, we did something else.  Control and disconnected consequences tend to make a child's behavior worse. Because children don't respond positively to…
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Why Preschoolers Know Much Better Than They Behave

Why Preschoolers Know Much Better Than They Behave

Alternatives to Punishment, Parenting, Parenting Solutions, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs
Parents are routinely confused when their preschooler (aged 2 to 5) promises they won’t hit or scream only to turn around and hit or scream again. Part of the problem is young children don’t think twice nor contemplate the consequences of their actions in the heat of the moment. I can assure you this is not part of a secret plot to drive parents crazy and it isn’t personal either. Preschoolers know much better than they can behave and are impulsive by design. The parts of the brain responsible for self-control are still under development in young children. The brain is only 20% developed at birth and will ideally become more integrated in the first 6 years of life. In other words, the brain is still forming connections that will…
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Three Tips For Getting Kids Ready and Out the Door Struggle Free

Three Tips For Getting Kids Ready and Out the Door Struggle Free

Help By Age & Stage, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs, Tweens 10-12 years
Do mornings at your house look like a scene from a stressful Groundhog's day video?  The same level of stress, the same rushing, and the same power struggles with your children day in and day out?  If it does, you are not alone!  One of the biggest challenges modern families seems to face is getting everyone out the door in the morning.  Of course it is physically easy to accomplish, but the biggest complaint I hear from the families I work with is that it is a constant struggle and can feel combative.  So what can you do? Three Tips for Getting Kids To Feel Cooperative and Capable in the Morning 1. Create and Keep a Routine Your Kid Will Want to Follow  In order to simplify, start by creating…
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8 Proven Ways That Teach Children To Respect Safety Rules

8 Proven Ways That Teach Children To Respect Safety Rules

Help By Age & Stage, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Parenting Solutions, Tweens 10-12 years
Have you ever told your children not to hide in a clothing store, not to touch dangerous things, or not to run in the parking lot? Have you had to say it more than once, only to find that they repeat the same behavior three minutes later? Why is this happening? Prohibition (like saying DON'T) is the most popular disciplinary short-cut in teaching kids about safety. It's an automatic response to stop the unwanted behavior. On the other hand, prohibition by itself works only temporarily. It does not address the root causes of the unwanted behavior. Kids’ natural curiosity washes out your rules like a high tide. Here are 8 proven ways to teach children to follow safety rules Step 1: Strive to establish an "I'm good" mindset. You need…
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10 Helpful Strategies for Parenting Super High Energy Kids

10 Helpful Strategies for Parenting Super High Energy Kids

Help By Age & Stage, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs
Positive Parenting Tools For Helping Your High Energy Child Thrive My daughter is so loud at times. She has more energy than I can handle for sure.  Shared a mom recently in a parents group. Well, my son just cannot slow down! He is totally the annoying kid I swore I would never have!!! It's SO overwhelming. shared another mom. Only a few parents will openly say that they find their child very annoying and overwhelming. But the reality is that some children have very energetic personalities. Do you have a high energy, full of life, must touch everything and ask 1,000 questions a day, can't sit still, curious, spunky, type of child? Do you sometimes feel frustrated with all the energy your child has? If it's feels like a bit much to…
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Why Positive Discipline is The Best Discipline for Your Baby

Why Positive Discipline is The Best Discipline for Your Baby

Alternatives to Punishment, Babies 0-12 months, Parenting
How To Discipline Your Baby In A Positive Way Responding positively to your baby teaches him to trust you and your guidance. While babies are growing they may do certain things, like spitting, hitting or kicking when upset, throwing food down from a high chair or taking a toy away from a playmate. These behaviors call for your clear, respectful guidance.  To discipline in a way that is effective and helpful to your growing baby (toddler) focus on teaching and guidance. Help your baby trust you and feel safe following your requests. A recent study at the University of Michigan has noted that spanking babies is a common, yet very misguided attempt at disciplining babies. Around 30 percent of one year old babies are being spanked at least once a month…
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Positive Discipline for Disruptive Classroom Behavior

Positive Discipline for Disruptive Classroom Behavior

Alternatives to Punishment, Help By Age & Stage, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Parenting Solutions, Positive Discipline
Positive Discipline at Home & School for Turning Disruptive Behavior Around Do you have any suggestions for a child who may be seeking the attention of his classmates? He is being disruptive in class trying to get other children to pay attention to him. He is an only child and due to work, we don’t get many play dates with other children. He gets plenty of attention at home as well as time to play alone. At school he is constantly wanting someone to look at him or laugh at him or talk to him. Attention Seeking = Connection Seeking One guess is that your child really seeks connection with his classmates, but mistakenly thinks that attention is what he needs. Several strategies will help him, but realize that it may…
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The Real Reason Kids Misbehave Again and Again – And How to Stop It

The Real Reason Kids Misbehave Again and Again – And How to Stop It

Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Positive Discipline, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs, Toddlers 12- 36 months
Why Children Misbehave And How To Help Them Do Better It was mid morning at playgroup and tension was rising between Theo, his mother and a phone. The phone was perfectly placed on the edge of a table. Peeking out just enough for tiny hands to want to reach up and touch. So Theo kept trying to do just that. Never mind the incessant don'ts from his mother ...They meant absolutely nothing to little Theo. Nothing! Testing his luck and his mom's patience with that glorious phone seemed like the one and only item on the morning's to do list. So shiny! So interesting! So irresistible! Each time Theo came close, his mom would nudge him to the side.  "Didn't you hear me? Don't touch! Or... we are going home. Is that what you want?…
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How I Helped My Son Understand His Misbehavior Without Relying on Punishments

How I Helped My Son Understand His Misbehavior Without Relying on Punishments

Alternatives to Punishment, Family Communication, Help By Age & Stage, Kids 5 - 12 years, Parenting, Parenting Solutions, Preschoolers 3-5 yrs
When my son was four,  I took him on a day trip to sled and play in the snow.  It was a beautiful cold yet sunny day.  Up on a mountain,  with the alps in the background we climbed up and sled down a hill some 25 times in a row. When I was a feeling cold and tired, I let my son know I would be sitting down for a break. Within seconds I felt a sharp,  freezing blow to my face. My eye hurt terribly. There was a strange mixture of cold and burning pain going on and I was totally dazed. As I processed what had happened,  I came to understand that my son had thrown a chunk of snow covered ice right into my face. Except he…
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